'beating cancer'

when i think of things i've hoped to accomplish in my life, beating cancer has certainly never been one of them. then again, maybe none of us really beat cancer. maybe science beats cancer. maybe our compassionate oncologists beat cancer. maybe drugs, photons and money beat cancer. maybe the researchers who lock up office doors at the end of a solid day's work, feeling disconnected from the human side of medicine, are really the ones who beat cancer.

maybe all we do is wait. we wait for the calendar page to turn. we wait to tick that list of dreaded treatments off our to-do lists. we wait to be called into an exam room and for our chemo IVs to finish. we wait for the day we can pass a mirror and actually recognize ourselves again. we wait to hear definitively that we're done waiting, all while the medical world gets better at beating cancer for the next person to walk in our shoes.

we become adept at waiting and, in the process, at quieting our minds, at appreciating the little things, at living in the moment. maybe when beating cancer becomes an accomplishment that sits firmly in the past tense, the rest of our lives will be better for it... happier, richer, funnier, more beautiful. it's hard to imagine life getting any better than it was B.C. (before cancer) but perhaps that will be the best side effect of all. :)